I have never liked someone telling me to WAIT! I think I have been bred to be the most impatient person ever. I tend to find myself always rushing and sometimes I don't even need to be. So the obvious thing I am always faced with is waiting. I had to wait until 18 to have a license and car, 21 to have my first boyfriend, 24 to get my dream job, 32 to get out of AZ, 33 to have our first house....the list goes on and on. God must be thinking when will she learn already??? After all, He always answers my prayers in one way or another and it's always been perfectly timed as He has planned. (in the past I have tried to make things happen on my own and have failed miserably everytime - it's not recommended!)
So while I have found myself impatient again about getting back into music ministry I know it's best to wait on Him. It's been years since I have done anything more with music than dust my piano and sing the ABC's. I have such an itch to do music ministry in some aspect, yet it's not time. My season is here in my home with my kids (I need to nurture thier spirits) and with my community in meeting any needs presented.
If, since i'm getting older by the second, and when God wants me to do music ministry He will make a way. So although it's hard to wait, I will embrace this season I'm in. There are lessons to be learned and character to be built in me that I don't want to miss. God open my eyes to see what you have for me right now in this moment. Slow me down and help me to stay present while I look ahead. And thank you God for being patient with me!
2 comments:
I was wondering how you were doing in this area of your life...thanks for being so candid. I too have similar feelings of wanting to be used in ministry but know for our family as well that it's not time yet. So let's wait together and in the meantime, our kids are getting some awesome loving care from their one & only mommies! (which is ministry in and of itself :)
Rhea, thanks so much for sharing these thoughts. I resonate with them SO much. We moved to a new town 3 years ago, and I joined the small, but very talented music ministry. I had just left a church where I was "big fish in a small pond" leading worship and having solos all the time. Then I stood in the back row of the choir for 2 years. It was hard for me to fight my pride and work through why I really wanted to be more involved. I felt unused, and considered switching churches because I was so frustrated. I got up the guts to talk to the music minister and told him candidly that I'd love to be used more--whatever that meant. I asked to sing for him again so he'd be familiar with my voice. He was very receptive and found jobs for me to sing (in front of the congregation and not) and has given me several opportunities since then.
Sounds like your wait is not the same as mine, but I just want to encourage you that I understand it is hard to not be used in an area where you feel God has legitimately gifted you. Have you auditioned for or humbly informed the church you are attending about your experience? I wish you could come to my church and sing with me!
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